A Guide to Practical Sex Magic

Real Magic

As we’re in this Halloween season and people talk freely of ghosts and magic I’d like to make a confession of my own. I believe in magic. Real magic of course. Carl Sagan, the famous scientist and educator, once famously said:

What an astonishing thing a book is. It’s a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you’re inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic.”

I wrote about this before. When you read my writing, I am inside your mind, speaking to you. And what a wonderful sexual organ your mind is. Through the magic of my words, I can arouse you and awake your senses. By just the hint of the things I write, I can cause your penis to stiffen or your vagina to moisten. Isn’t it a wonderful thing? 😉

The Magic of Sex

In ancient cultures, sex was considered magical and I firmly believe that to be the case. Just like my words can cause things to happen inside your mind different displays of sex can have powerful effects on our minds and even change the way the world works.

I wrote a story all about the magic of dance. Dance is a form of sex magic. It’s even in the Bible and the Book of Mormon. Women danced and were able to demand of kings things that they would never have been able to achieve without it. Of course, this is a bad thing. It cost John the Baptist his head. But it doesn’t have to be. It can cause a great deal of good as well.

A Beginners Exercise

There is a certain magic that you can do with little training but some discipline. I suggest you try it. You probably masturbate. Guys especially. For men, you probably use your hand or something else to stroke yourself until you orgasm and you ejaculate. For women, it may be more complicated. I use my hands, but many times I use a vibrator externally as I have more powerful orgasms when I’m stimulated from my clitoris. Other women are different.

No matter how we do it, usually we wank it as a means to an end. We want to cum. So we do it to get there. But what do we do once we cum? Physically a bunch of cool stuff happens. There’s a dump of pleasure hormones in our brain that are designed to emotionally bond us with our partner. When we go “solo” however there is no partner and our brain chemicals have no one to bond with. This causes a cascade of chemical confusion. Chemically it’s like sitting down to a delicious dinner, picking up the knife and fork and then being shoved over backward in the chair and kicked out of the feast. This is why many people feel a flood of guilt after they masturbate to pornography. It’s chemical. (BTW learn how to spell masturbate. It’s not that hard. But the internet is full of idiots who can’t spell that word. While we’re on it, learn the difference between woman and women).

From a magical perspective jerking it over porn or just cumming for cum’s sake is the equivalent of going to a store, buying one jolly rancher with $100 bill and not asking for change. It’s a massive waste. Here’s how to fix it:


Step 1: Breathing

I do yoga and stuff. I’d say I’m a hippie deep down inside, but it’s not really that deep. I do use deodorant though and I refuse to eat kale chips no matter what vegan kombucha oil you may have baked them in. Kombucha isn’t an oil. That was a test. If you don’t know what it is, you passed. There’s a lot to be said about the way we breathe and the power our minds can have over our body. I mean, you’re staring at squiggles on a page and hallucinating my voice right now. That’s mind over body.

There’s power in breathing. Breath is life, but you probably pay very little attention to it. It’s the only part of our automatic body function that you can take control of. You probably breathe wrong. Take a deep breath. Wrong. Most of us puff out our chests when we do that like we’re trying to stay afloat. It’s actually the least effective way to take a deep breath. Instead, imagine your lungs are like vases and when you inhale you fill them from the bottom up with air instead of water. Don’t breathe in water. It’s ineffective.

Your lungs hold about 7 pints of air, but we usually only take in 1 whenever we breathe. Here’s how you take this breath. Don’t do it lying down. Breathe in through the nostrils, keeping your mouth closed and filling the lower chambers of your lungs first. This means your belly will distend as you do so. Then allow your upper chambers to fill up almost all the way. Imagine you’re breathing in 6 out of those 7 pints. Your breathing rate will slow almost in half if you do it properly. Letting your belly expand is the key. If you made a triangle with your hands over your bellybutton, when you inhale they should separate. It’s not the most attractive way to breathe but it slows your heart rate, lowers stress, reduces blood pressure and of course calms that big sex organ, your mind.

Step 2: Lock it Up

Squeeze your butthole tight and hold it. There. You just did step 2. Bet you didn’t expect that request today. It’s a kegel exercise. Doing them for men actually will help you have an impressive range on your ejaculations. For us lady-folk, it stops us from peeing our pants after we have babies.

After you get the hang of Step 1 you add Step 2 to it. Once you inhale you hold it for a few seconds and as you do so you lock it up. It’s actually called a “base lock”. When you gently exhale, you gently release that kegel. What does this do? It keeps your mind from wandering around and allows your body to get synced with everything.

Step 3: Get It On

You’ll feel super relaxed and calm after doing Steps 1 and 2. How long should you do them? Depends. At first 5 minutes is great. I have done it for an hour before. The goal is to make yourself feel light, luminous and empty inside. You’ll feel wonderful. Now gently shift your mind to the erotic. I keep my eyes closed and focus on that empty and luminous feeling. I let images come into my mind. Do not look at pornography. It’s not that I think porn is bad, but it’s like drinking 2 liters of Coke and Red Bull before going to bed. It’s not going to help you achieve what you want.

I’ve heard men abstain from sex and masturbation for 3 days before doing this, sometimes longer. Edging during that time can help as well. Basically, your mind has to be a fertile erotic landscape and if you can’t do that without external help, well, you need to be able to do that.

Focus on your pleasure. Imagine your lover in your mind. Conjure their smells and textures. Focus on the way their skin feels. If you don’t have a lover imagine me or the characters of my stories. You should powerfully feel your pleasure build. This is the most crucial point. Don’t vigorously jerk it. Go slowly. Very slowly. Use body-safe lotion. It’s great.

Step 4: The Eruption

Our goal is not to splooge and be done. So avoid the temptation to hurry towards climax. Let it come on its own. Pun intended. There’s an overwhelming surge when you focus on your orgasm. My husband says he feels it build deep inside him and then it just surges outward. I’ve seen him ejaculate when he’s done this. He shot me directly in the eye once and he shot clear over his head as well. It’s a powerful thing. This is the only way I’ve been able to “squirt”. It was a long fluid stream that powerfully shot from me. I hardly noticed until I looked at the wall afterward. But you’ll come and you’ll feel that rush. If you’re in that luminous state you’ll experience something divine. alluring-attractive-beautiful-woman-1024797

There’s a moment when our minds literally turn off and we think of nothing. Nothing. It’s just naked bliss. The more you practice this, the longer that period lasts. And there’s the magic. All kinds of wonderful feelings and sensations can happen in that space. Yes, I’ve had visions. I know it sounds strange, not like religious visions. It’s like I’m floating in space, or back in the womb. Or something. It’s special. That’s what your $100 bill buys you. If you do this, I promise porn will lose its appeal for you.

Eventually, you can focus your effort toward your partner and influence them sexually, but that’s a post for another time.

By The Lady Meredith

Author and Advocate for a sex-positive lifestyle for all people.


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